Musician Jokes

Hi everyone, and a copious dose of "sorry" for not updating this blog spot for so long. Another year....let's hope it's a good one. Judging from the swing of things in 2006, it looks like live entertainment is on it's way up again after a few years of being really quiet on the corporate front.

Anyway....here are a few of my favourite musician jokes. Like they say, comedy is funny when it mirrors real life.


What happens if you play blues music backwards?

Your wife comes back and treats you okay, and you don't wake up in the morning.


What do you get when you cross a tuba player and a goalpost?

A goalpost that can't march!


How do you know when a trombone player is at your door?

The doorbell drags!


The singer says to her piano player : "I'd like to do 'My Funny Valentine' tonight, but how about we arrange it a little?"

The piano player says : "Ok, how about this; we do the first chorus in G minor, then modulate to G# minor for the second chorus in three quarter time, then modulate to A minor in three quarter time for the bridge, then cut off the last three bars."

She says : "That sounds complicated."

And the piano player says : "Well that's how you did it last night!"


Hey buddy, how late does the band play?

Oh, about half a beat behind the drummer!


What's the difference between a dead trombone player lying in the road and a dead squirrel lying in the road?

The squirrel might have been on his way to a job!


A seven year old kid says to his dad, "When I grow up, I want to be a musician."

The dad says, "Make up your mind!"


St. Peter is checking ID's. He asks a man, "What did you do on earth?"
The man says, "I was a doctor."

St. Peter says, "Ok, go right through those pearly gates. Next! What did you do on earth?"
The man says, "I was a school teacher."

"Go right through those pearly gates. Next? What did you do on earth?"
The man says, "I was a musician."

St. Peter says, "Go around the side, up the freight elevator, through the kitchen....."


Why do bagpipers always walk when they play?

To get away from the noise!


What do you get when you play New Age music backwards?

New Age music!


How many musician jokes are there?

Just one. All the rest are true!


Here's to a fabulous 2007! Let the music play on.....